Friday, May 23, 2014

Stopping the Bleeding

  Most experts agree that managing debt is a simple matter of addition.  Income must be higher than expenses (provided the extra income is applied to the debt principal).  I had an excellent idea of my monthly income.  Expenses, however, were another matter.  I needed to stop using my cards.  At this point, they served as withdrawal protection, keeping my checks from bouncing.  The debit card would not allow point of service purchases without the covering balance in the account.  When it was declined, I used the plastic, covering expenses from McDonald's to gas to utilities.
    I hated looking at my balances and statements. It sent me spiraling into anxiety and self-flagellation:  How would I pay this? Look at how it was adding up! Would I ever get out of debt? How had I been so foolish?.  I knew if I had any hope of every being debt-free, strict accountability was paramount.  I pulled up each statement and began writing down my expenses: Wells Fargo (mortgage) $2058, Car note $256, Student loan 1 (the smallest) $50, electric bill $120.  The monthly bills were appropriate. 
   "Food and Miscellaneous" spending was quite another: Target $75 (for what exactly? I had no idea?), Plastic Surgeon $400 (botox...an absolute necessity, right?); Kroger $222, $250, $180, $200 (for one 34 year old woman, two cats and a dog, what were we subsisting on? Ice wine and caviar?); McDonald's a monthly total of $35 (wow that's healthy); 7-11 $36 (this was not for gas, mind you, these were "junk food runs", grad school is stressful but $70?).  I continued to examine my statements for the previous months: piano lessons $70/weekly (completely makes sense when you think of how MUCH extra time I must have had!).
  Perhaps the most egregious was a November trip to Las Vegas.  I had competed in a a natural (growth-hormone free) bikini (body sculpting) competition: air fare $450, Hotel $250 (at a less than fabulous casino scheduled for demolition. My room smelled like stale pizza), competition suit $175, tanning $120, Makeup lesson $200, precompetition  body-wrap $100 plus gratuity, Personal Trainer $300, Petsitter $150, Airport Parking $60.  All on the credit cards.  All to finish in last place.
   What on earth was I doing? Or thinking for that matter? My income would go up upon completion of my degree and certification, but I was spending as if a money tree was going to sprout in the back yard.  
    I began to formulate a basic budget.  It was too large for my current income.  I cut corners here and there, trimming away the fat.
    My first goal was to establish a small savings account.  Even putting $1000 aside was going to require time and effort.  How easily I had "spent" that just a few weeks ago! Now the evidence rested in my statements, collecting interest for someone else. I felt overwhelmed by the sheer amount of the debt ($66,000) and deeply embarrassed.  Now it was time to pay it back.  Proverbs 22:7 "The rich rule over the poor and the borrower is a slave to the lender".  How many years of slavery did I have ahead?

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